Look For What You Have In Common-Not The Differences, Is My Success Coaching Tip Today
This Success Coaching Tip was inspired by an email I received about my last post that talked about how to manifest where I interviewed Bill Cooley. Bill told his story of success that came after frustration while doing the work necessary to gain his skills. I am responding here because there are so many others that contact me at times and express the same line of thinking as the person who emailed-that there are “the chosen few” and they stand apart from the rest who aren’t meant to be successful. There was a tone of hopelessness but I know there are action steps and things that can be done to change any situation. I feel that we must do all we can to find and hang on to hope.
I know when a person feels down and out, it seems like success is for others, those who have something going for them that is missing in you. This person in particular referred to the “chosen few,” saying the stories are about the other person’s success, which is totally unrelated to them and their own life that is full of un-success.
But here is my common sense success coaching tip:
Look for the things you have in common instead of looking for why they have what you don’t, or looking for differences.
Here is what I had to say and would say to anyone who looks for a reason someone else can have success that is denied to his or herself:
I hear you but I don’t agree with you at all about the chosen few. I know in my heart that is not true. But I do understand how you feel and I know what it is to feel that kind of pain. During those times in my life, I have turned to my faith in God because I believe in a Higher Power and my NDE showed me that God loves me no matter what. I’ve had to figure out the rest and have felt very alone at times so I relate to how you feel. But know it can be different and that is what drives me to do success coaching and share my stories.
If you haven’t heard my “Slam Your Fist Down” audio, maybe it can help. I was at a very low point just a few years ago but it changed because I made up my mind that it would. But I had to take action in order to change how bad life felt to me at the time. I made a decision to look for opportunities. I made a decision to change my focus and create something different. Every day I put one foot in front of the other and worked on changing my life. I looked for things to feel a connection with and relate to instead of looking for things that caused me to feel separated from the world; separated from a life of happiness.
I hope you will do the same thing. I don’t believe life is easy for anyone, even when it appears that way. In my various Success Coaching Programs, I have worked with too many people who’ve had tremendous pain in their lives yet others wish they had a “successful life” like that. They may have had money or things others wanted, but they didn’t have the peace of success. It is all about finding a way to be at peace inside. And there are ways to do that, thankfully.
Sometimes just doing something like an act of kindness for someone else does wonders. Now THAT IS a FACT. It changes your body chemistry and that helps you feel better about life and that can get things rolling in a new direction. Find things to be inspired by because there are plenty of unsung heroes with lots of challenges that are making the world a better place. Then they get to feel good about life because they are making a difference.
Acts of kindness, exercise, mindful slow deep breathing, and energy work are proven to help with the way you feel, and turning off negative influences in your life. Yes, any of that takes a little bit of effort, but not much really and the benefits are amazing.
Or… you can put all of your focus on the problem. But that’s no way to live in my opinion. I say this only because I care enough to ask you to think about whether or not most of your focus is on yourself and your problem. Sometimes that is the best thing to do, to be focused on yourself and concentrating on healing yourself, and in my success coaching process you would be assessing that.
But sometimes the best medicine actually comes from finding a different focus. Studies show that doing little acts of kindness for others can actually be very healing AND that the greatest happiness comes from giving of yourself to others. Finding those little action steps that are a good fit are a part of the process we go through when working together, but you can also do that on your own.
And there are so many free things online these days and even in libraries that you don’t have to have extra money for success coaching.
I say this as a way to jump the gun because I also hear, “Well I don’t have extra money for success coaching or other things like some people.” And my reply could be, “Well I don’t have extra money for all the things I want that could make my life easier either.” I don’t think there is an excuse good enough to not take action and do something to improve things.
Every time I speak or have an opportunity to share my stories, I include the steps I went through so that anyone can use them as models.
It is just a matter of deciding to do something to change what you don’t like. And the fastest way to do that is to work on changing the way you think, feel and see life. Change your Triangle For Success – TFS. Change that and things will change- and it works that way for ANYONE!
Topic: Success Coaching Tip-looking for similarities, not differences.